DEAR ABBY: I was invited to my nephew’s wedding out of state and accepted the invitation. It’s a four-hour drive. My son wasn’t interested in attending, and my boyfriend wasn’t sure he could attend due to work travel. The mother of the bride informed me that she had decided to “put” an elderly relative in my room with me, claiming they were now out of rooms. (She’s known to be miserly and dishonest.)

There was no offer to share costs, and it was assumed that I’d transport, dress and monitor the relative. I ended up declining the invitation, and I regret not being at my nephew’s wedding. My boyfriend was able to attend but, by then, I couldn’t make an appropriate room arrangement. Thoughts? — SKIPPED IT IN THE EAST

DEAR SKIPPED IT: Just this: Because you felt the mother of the bride should have asked your permission rather than “tell” you her plan was for you to babysit the relative, you were within your rights to refuse to do anything that made you uncomfortable.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.